Explora Life Satisfaction Questionnaire
When life is busy, or all your energy is focused on a special project, it's all too easy to find yourself "off balance", not paying enough attention to important areas of your life. While you need to have drive and focus if you're going to get things done, taking this too far can lead to frustration and intense stress. That's when it's time to take a "helicopter view" of your life, so that you can bring things back into balance.
This is where the Explora Life Satisfaction Questionnaire can help, it helps you consider each area of your life in turn and assess what's off balance. And so, it helps you identify areas that need more attention.
Click here to use the Explora Life Satisfaction Questionnaire.
The Black Door
There's a Middle Eastern story of a spy who had been captured and sentenced to death by a general of the Persian army. The general had fallen upon a strange and rather bizarre custom. He permitted the condemned person to make a choice. He could either face the firing squad or pass through the black door.
As the moment of execution drew near, the general ordered the spy to be brought before him for a short, final interview, the primary purpose of which was to receive the answer of the doomed man to the question: "Which shall it be---the firing squad or the black door?"
This was not an easy question, and the prisoner hesitated, but soon he made it known that he much preferred the firing squad. Not long thereafter, a volley of shots in the courtyard announced the grim sentence had been fulfilled. The general, staring at his boots, turned to his aide and said, "You see how it is with men; they will always prefer the known way to the unknown. It is characteristic of people to be afraid of the undefined. And yet I gave him his choice."
"What lies behind the black door?" asked the aide. "Freedom," replied the general, "and I've known only a few men brave enough to take it."
Like so many stories out of the Middle East, this one carries a pretty hefty message. The first is, of course, that we will often choose the familiar, even if it's undesirable, over the unknown, which might be a wonderful opportunity. And second, that few people are brave enough to choose freedom.
I'm not saying we should reject the familiar---not by any means. But we should question the familiar.
Just because it's familiar doesn't make it good, better, or the best thing to do.
When you heard the story about the black door, you probably said to yourself, "I would have chosen the black door. I would have had nothing to lose; the firing squad was certain death." And most people would say the same thing.
But actually faced with the choice, would you? How many doors to freedom have we passed up during our lives because we tend to cling so fiercely to the familiar?
How many times have events come about that we worried and stewed about--- even thought calamitous at the time---and that later proved to be blessings in disguise?
Each of them was a black door through which we passed to greater freedom. But at the time, we would have chosen to keep things, as they were if we had been given the chance.
At any rate, it's one of those stories that makes for interesting discussion at the dinner table, or with friends.
Tell the story of the black door, and see what sort of reaction you get.
It's good to remember, if we can, that it is often those things we worry about and most fear that turn out to be blessings in disguise.
Why Does Coaching Work?
by ANDREW on SEPTEMBER 1, 2010
If you’re like me, at least a little bit, you want to know why stuff works. I’ve a long history of pulling things apart to see what makes them tick. It’s just something I need to do. I can appreciate magic but I can’t help thinking of an explanation for the effect. Perhaps you do too.
That’s why I was initially a bit sceptical about coaching. I know there are lots of great true-to-life examples of coaching success, especially from the sports world. Which great Olympian doesn’t have a coach? And team sports just wouldn’t be the same or, perhaps exist, without the Coach alongside the players. So why the hesitation?
I just had to have a framework, some foundation, to understand why a coach isn’t simply an expensive nag. Well I found it when I started to explore the neuroscience-based approach taken by David Rock. He’s built on relatively recent discoveries about how our brains actually work to construct a coaching model and process that takes advantage of our innate behaviour to instill new thoughts and habits without undue pain and stress.
He’s not alone in this approach of course. Dr. John Medina, on the basis of his neuro-biological work, has also written a brilliant “expose” explaining how we can exploit our brains to enhance our productivity. In his book, Brain Rules, he sets out twelve basic rules to follow to think and act better – and describes the brain activity that supports each.
Back to David Rock. Over time he evolved his coaching experience and interest in neuroscience into coherent coaching methods. Results Coaching Systems is the organization he created to spread these methods. To date, more than 6000 folks worldwide have participated in his coaching development programs. I’m one of them.
So what’s the big deal you ask? For me, it’s having the understanding of how what we’re doing in a coaching engagement is actually leveraging our brains. With this approach we can achieve new goals and behaviour faster than by simply exploring options in less structured way. We can get better results faster by being aware of, and avoiding, the distractions and roadblocks that our brains love to put in the way of doing something new.
It’s amazing how limited our capacity to think actually is. To a great degree we pass through our days on autopilot; doing things without a great deal of conscious thought. There’s a good reason for this – it’s called survival. Imagine if we had to consciously think of each choice that we face every morning. We’d never get out the door! The habits and automatic responses that we develop over time are energy-saving tactics. Thinking is hard work, consumes energy and we’ll simply avoid doing it if possible.
Coaching with the brain in mind can overcome these aspects of our behaviour that conspire to hold us back from new ideas and action. I’m not saying that remarkable things don’t happen in the absence of this understanding. But doesn’t it make sense that if you know how something works it’s likely you’ll use it better?
Written by Andrew at It’s Understood Communication
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